The music is perfect. The mix of pulsing techno with a slight variation of hip-hop gives audience members an excited feeling. The cinematography is captivating and pleasantly ambiguous, until the end when the truth finally is revealed. Every one of the array of scenes is both artistically beautiful and truly entertaining to watch. Without a doubt, Nintendo made a commercial for its upcoming Game Cube worthy of...
Oops, I'm sorry, I'm supposed to be writing a review for Lions Gate Films' "The Wash," starring Dr. Dre and Snoop Dogg. I couldn't help talking about the Nintendo Game Cube commercial because it was the best part of my "The Wash" movie experience.
Luckily for DJ Pooh, they still allow movies with absolutely no plotline whatsoever to be shown on movie screens. This is why the writer/director's second movie, "The Wash," is now showing in theaters across America.
Basically, "The Wash" revolves around the simple story that Sean (Dr. Dre) loses his job at Footlocker and gets a job at a Los Angeles carwash where his best friend, Dee Loc (Snoop Dogg), works. As assistant manager, Sean supposedly becomes too responsible, alienates his friend and fellow employees and complains constantly until his boss gets kidnapped and a rescue must be planned.
Though this may sound like a plot, it can only be found by picking through the endless amount of fat jokes, funny acts of thievery, loose women scenes and trite dialogue that clogs the movie throughout its 94 minutes.
The character development, or lack thereof, is relatively simple and stagnant. Snoop Dogg's character loves to buy, sell and smoke marijuana (big surprise there) and have constant sex. Dr. Dre's Sean borders on being responsible, has little luck with the women and is basically a boring guy. The level of sophistication gets even more menial with the supporting characters. The women are either loose or ugly. Mr. Washington, played by under-used comedian George Wallace, is a tough, strict man with a gun. The car wash employees are either thieves, stupid, strong or stoned.
The directing is sluggish and uncontrolled throughout the film. As well, the cinematography is unexciting and at times seems to be created by a blind 10 year old.
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But honestly, these judgments are irrelevant. If you go to a movie starring Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre, you aren't expecting a grade-A comedy. What you are expecting is to see women with attitudes and promiscuous tendencies. You are looking forward to watching Snoop Dogg smoke ridiculous amounts of pot while saying things such as "I pay the cost to be the boss." You expect to see low-brow comedy depicting an overweight rent-a-cop who loves to eat donuts.
In a sense, the average person interested in seeing "The Wash" won't be angry to find that the "movie" is basically an excuse for Dr. Dre and Snoop Dogg to gather their friends (Ludacris, Xzibit, Tiny Lister, Eminem) and screw around in front of a camera without any real care about giving their audience something entertaining to watch.
Occasionally the movie is funny; there are a few scenes that should make most people laugh. Comic lines such as "What, do you think you're Destiny's Child, no one said ya name?" are scattered around the script. DJ Pooh, who seems to be a better actor than director, is a pleasure to watch, as he plays one of the bumbling kidnappers of Mr. Washington. He is genuinely funny as he falls, curses and gets hit on screen while attending to his grumpy prisoner.
Other highlights of the film include watching Shaquille O'Neal squish a thieving car wash employee, seeing Ludacris complain about Windex being used on his rims, hearing Snoop Dogg say "Shizza my Nizza" and watching the brief moments when Tiny Lister graces the screen (he played Deboe in "Friday").
Basically, my opinion of this movie can be reflected by analyzing the following scene (which appears midway through the film): An unsuspecting car wash employee opens the trunk of a mobster's car, sees Pauly Shore gagged and bound, gets reprimanded and watches as Pauly Shore gets beaten. This scene is indicative of how the movie is inherently bad, like Pauly Shore, but redeems itself with brief moments of comedy and novelty, such as Pauly Shore getting hit.
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