Last week, the Department of Homeland Security held the press conference that launched a thousand duct tape jokes. Officials of the newly-minted department advised Americans on ways they can prepare for terrorist attacks, including stocking their homes with extra food and buying supplies like blankets, spare batteries and, yes, duct tape.
The Grand Duct Tape Preparedness Plan didn't go over well. Reaction to the advisory was swift and mostly negative. In a monologue, Jay Leno wondered if MacGyver, and not Tom Ridge, is the true mastermind behind homeland security policy; newspaper editorialists rechristened the Department of Homeland Security as the Department of Homeland Insecurity; political satire Web sites talked about the need to "duct and cover."
People are quick to criticize the Department of Homeland Security, calling the advisories stupid and the frequent terrorist alerts unnecessary. However, they never acknowledge that the department's measures are working, and they never, ever come up with any other ideas for how department should better do its extremely difficult job.
The department is certainly an easy target of criticism: People wonder why a governmental body with a staff of thousands and a yearly budget of $35 billion hasn't been able to show the public any actual accomplishments. They wonder why the frequent terror alerts that raise the already high level of anxiety in the country are really necessary.
But while it may be fun to make fun of the department and come up with additions to the color-coded alert system -- "Now introducing fuschia, the 'yup, we're screwed' level!" -- critics shouldn't ignore the fact that the department has been doing an impossible job pretty darn well. The department can never really show the public overt signs of success, because its biggest product is nothing: for nothing to happen, for no more terrorist attacks to occur. In the anti-terror business, the fruit of labor isn't tangible -- it's for life to proceed, more or less as normal, for one more day. And the department has delivered. There hasn't been another attack, and it's probably not for lack of trying on terrorists' part.
Though measures like the terror alert system are simple ideas, they're simple ideas that seem to work. Critics of the color-coded alarm system and frequent alerts say they increase citizens' anxiety levels -- Tipper Gore told CNN.com that being on a heightened state of alert can be mentally "exhausting" for Americans ("Tipper Gore: Daily alerts 'exhausting' for mental health," May 24, 2002). A bit of anxiety, however, is a small price to pay for citizens to pay if there is even a small chance of heightened awareness averting another attack, and past experience seems to indicate that heightened awareness does help. In a recent CNN interview, former president Bill Clinton cited instances during his administration in which making citizens aware of increased levels of threat (though these were the pre-rainbow code days) helped to stop planned terrorist attacks. Though the first World Trade Center bombing happened during his administration, there were a lot of things that didn't because the government asked citizens to be on the alert: an attack on the Lincoln Tunnel, on the Holland Tunnel and the Los Angeles airport, as well as planned bombings in cities in the Northeast and Northwest during the millennium celebrations (Bill Clinton on Larry King Live, CNN, Feb.6). There's not much we can do in the short term to dry up the seemingly never-ending supply of dictators who have it in for the United States, and it's impossible to make security at the country's borders airtight. The most important resource the United States has in the effort to prevent another attack is its own citizens -- their eyes and ears and ability to alert the government to potential terrorist activity. The terror alarm system is a vital way in which we can capitalize on that resource.
As for the duct tape preparedness plan: Yes, it's a bit silly, especially considering that terror experts say duct tape and plastic sheeting won't do much good if there is a chemical or biological attack. Critics wonder why the department can't come up with a better idea than duct tape. Though the critics are quick to offer adhesive-themed quips when the department makes suggestions, however, there's one thing they never offer: alternative suggestions.
There is a scary possibility that there isn't much the government -- or any government -- can do to protect citizens in the event of a chemical or biological attack. The fact that no one in a nation of 250 million people has come up with any better ideas may be an indication that that scary possibility is a reality. The most the government may be able to do is give people tips on how to be generally prepared, or at least feel like they are prepared. Next time, though, they might want to leave out the hardware supplies.
(Laura Sahramaa's column appears Tuesdays in The Cavalier Daily. She can be reached at lsahramaa@cavalierdaily.com.)
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