As senior year of high school approached, one of my best guy friends completely swore off applying to east coast schools based on "many first-hand accounts" that the girls on the Atlantic were "not so hot."
Appalled, yet twistedly fond of his egomaniac tendencies, I laughed and asked, "How can you believe such a myth, and what makes you think the girls back East would go for your skater shoes, sagging skater shorts and crusty skater hair, charming as they all may be?" He turned to me, and with an exaggerated look of exasperation and responded, "What was the moral of Avril Lavigne's 'Sk8r Boi'?! No, really, it's not whether the myth is true or false, it's simply the fact that it exists that freaks me out."
[I recognize the absurdity of this statement, but the fact of the matter is that this was the boy who sought a continuation of high school -- the good ol' University of Arizona. He accepted his fate, and thus belonged in Tucson.]
With further prodding, I discovered that the real culprit behind his and other "urban legends" of college reputations lay not in total ignorance but in the proliferation of those random college rankings floating around everywhere. From The Princeton Review to U.S. News, from Playboy to Rolling Stone, everyone seems to have an opinion in the great debate over hippest college town, most scenic campus, biggest Greek life, ease in ordering late-night take-out, etc., etc., etc.
In my opinion, these polls are to blame for the entire first semester of my senior year -- nothing else could have prompted an otherwise sane person to apply to 14 colleges. Yet, though I was obviously not going to choose my school based on Collegeprowler.com's evaluation of its "Reefer" qualities or tolerance of hard alcohol, I was interested as to why some of my choices -- such as U.Va. -- were mysteriously missing from the top tiers in certain (non-academic) categories.I realized my friend did have a point-- but luckily, I had heard the opposite was true for east coast boys and chose Virginia quite wisely (Gentlemen, you may take that as a direct compliment.)
Anyway, the influence of college rankings did not occur to me again until I ran into Mr. "West Coast Only" this summer (who I have heard does not get much play at the U of A, should you care) and again revisited the topic. My research led me to the Mecca of all college ranking sites -- TheHottestCoed.com.
U.Va., shockingly, was nowhere to be seen in the Top 25 -- rankings based entirely on some guys who (quite brilliantly, I must say) made a career out of refereeing schools as they battle for a stereotype (as if they have real control over it). Essentially, students must send in picture submissions of hot girls on their campus in order to move up the chart. How these girls are judged is unclear, and who has the time or wherewithal to care where their school stands on the completely ambiguous BillBoard Chart of Hotness is beyond me. It was at this point that I discovered the heart of the matter: there should be a ranking for schools that just don't care.
Granted, TheHottestCoed.com is not too far off the mark in the #1 placement of UT (Austin as in Texas, not Tennessee, people) -- a big winner on almost all rankings I found and rightfully so. Texas breeds a mighty fine student body, I can attest. Lots of Matthew McConaughey look-alikes. Neither should one argue that USC (again, Southern California) or Georgia or Florida are particularly heinous. And Arizona, well, my home state brings in the Top 5 at both the U of A and ASU -- if you like the "I put out" look of Juicy jumpsuits and Rocket Dogs and the fact that most of ASU's frats were kicked off campus for running a pornographic video ring. But I digress...
So there is some truth to the rankings. Yet should one find U.Va.'s absence from the list worrisome?
A general consensus of actual students considers U.Va. a concentration of extremely good-looking, well-put together, intelligent guys and girls ... almost too good to be true -- very "Temptation Island" or "Real World" in its make-up. And the thing that is so great about Virginia is that we fly under the radar --- no need to rely on our superficial "HottestCoed.com" ranking.
I myself have heard many "first-hand accounts" of U.Va. grads disillusioned with the looks of the New York, D.C. or Atlanta bar scene compared to underdog Charlottesville. I've seen many a visitor shocked by the caliber of smart and fun students (work hard, play hard ... cliché but true). And if you're a first year girl who's been told you're pretty cute, just wait until Rush.
I suppose this column has been targeted at the first years, currently orienteering their way through the panic of attempting to secure a Spanish class past 8 am. To ease your anxiety, I hope you see my point about these rankings (because it's not the myth's validity but the fact it exists, right?): At U.Va., we just don't care.
Besides, I guarantee you will be pleasantly surprised.
But after all, you did come to college to learn, right?
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