In the minds of dejected little girls across the country, there is perhaps no greater cause of heartbreak than the cruel reality that B2K's first movie will probably be its last. The repercussions of the pop group's bombshell breakup announcement, which prompted three consecutive days of mourning on 106 and Park, haunt every frame of the foursome's final film, "You Got Served." How do the slighted group members feel each time they see themselves in erstwhile amiable scenes with their recently departed lead singer? Are there any signs of tension or unhappiness that might have foreshadowed his stunning departure?
Actually, "You Got Served" isn't really a chronicle of the slow crumbling demise of B2K, as much as I wish it was. Instead, the movie is a showcase for the combined acting muscle of Omari, "Omarion" Grandberry, Jarell "J-Boog" Houston, DeMario "Raz-B" Thornton and Dreux "Lil' Fizz" Frederic --if by acting muscle you mean street-dancing skills.
Former B2K member and lead singer Omarion, whose name sounds like some sort of Islamic robot, plays David, a young street dancer with a passion for competition. His best friend is Elgin, played by Marques "MH" Houston, Omarion's older brother and member of IMX.
Interestingly enough, the movie was directed by Chris Stokes, the former manager of B2K, who now manages only Omarion and MH. As such, it is certainly simply a coincidence that these two are provided starring roles in the movie that their manager directed and wrote.
David and Elgin spend all their days practicing and training with their crew for raucous street dance-offs. Their reputations as top street dancers are called into question, however, after they are routed by the crew of the villainous white-boy Wade, whose savage intensity and spiky haircut reminded me of Sonic the Hedgehog. Having lost their titles as kings of the dance-street, Elgin and David's crew are forced to overcome numerous difficulties, staking everything on an ultimate final dance challenge that will prove once and for all which dance team reigns supreme.
To be fair, the cookie-cutter plot is a bit more complex than I've made it out to be, including shocking betrayals, gang violence, drug trafficking and a few more tidbits that aren't simply recycled plot elements from "Bring It On." There's even a romantic subplot thrown in for Omarion's character David, who rocks a pigtail-like hairstyle throughout the movie, apparently inspired by Pippi Longstocking.
David becomes attracted to Elgin's younger sister, Liyah, and director Chris Stokes manages to buck teen-movie convention by casting a sassy female sidekick who is even hotter than the main love interest. Liyah's wisecracking best friend is named Beautifull (that's not a typo), and her over-the-top narcissism and catty commentary are one of the highlights of the movie.
My other favorite minor character was Elgin's hilarious overacting "Big Momma" grandmother, who sniffs roses and hums to herself and isn't afraid to hand out a butt-whooping when necessary.
Speaking of minor characters, "You Got Served" is riddled from start to finish with pseudo-celebrity cameos, who brighten up the movie, if only for the purposes of recalling where exactly you remember them from. Thus, while the important cameo roles belong to Steve Harvey as street-dance officiator, and multi-platinum artist Lil' Kim as a celebrity judge, there are also surprising bit roles by random sitcom actors that are fun to remember. I picked out Jackée from "227" and "Sister Sister," Professor Oglevee from "The Parkers," and the girl from the "21 Questions" video.
Unfortunately, most audience members above the age of 12 will need such random activities in order to sustain their interest towards the end of the film's surprisingly protracted narrative. For example, through the course of the movie, I counted approximately 267 hip-hop handshakes and half-hugs. I assume the director included so many because really, how are we as an audience supposed to know if a character is entering or departing from a scene unless we see a hip-hop handshake and half-hug?
Despite the presence of several admittedly exhilarating and fun-to-watch dance sequences that are accompanied by well-chosen booming hip-hop tracks, the director overuses the high-energy dance scenes and ends up sapping the dramatic tension from the final dance-off. If Stokes had kept up the film's early brisk pace, "You Got Served" would have been an enjoyable, if still terribly acted movie. Instead, the relentlessly lame plot elements and drawn-out after-school hokeyness push the B2K movie into the realm of the hilariously awful, but not into that rare cadre of films that are so bad they're good.
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