Summer's in the air, finals loom on the horizon and it's that time of year for those of us wrapping up our time at the paper -- so without further ado, we present this semester's Pink Flamingos:
The Trojan Man Award goes to Del. Bob Marshall, for his efforts to end college fornication.
The No Representation with Taxation Award goes to the Virginia House of Delegates and their firm commitment to seeing Virginia's budget all the way to rock bottom.
The Lost in Syndication Award goes to Bob Saget for his complete incompetence at stand-up comedy. Where's Danny Tanner when you need him?
The Best Special Effects Award goes to the IMP Society. Really, there aren't enough out-of-control bonfires on the Lawn.
The Mathematically Impossible Tally Award goes to Rebeen Pasha for his inept calculation of election results.
The Stalkers' Anonymous Award goes to TheFacebook.com. As if we didn't need another reason not to leave our computers.
The What Are We Compensating for Award goes to the Diversity Center and its 61-inch plasma television.
The Who Wants to Be a Millionaire Award goes to the over 300 CIOs who applied for appropriations this spring. We hope some of them escaped unscathed by the process.
The Perfect Storm Award goes to Hurricane Isabel. It takes a real force of nature for the University to cancel classes.
The Best Anachronism Award goes to the Charlottesville Police Department for its use of cutting-edge technology within a painful centuries-old context.
The Politico Incest Award goes to Student Council President-elect Noah Sullivan and President Daisy Lundy, for their impending switch of offices, president and chief of staff.
The It's the Economy, Stupid Award goes to the Graduate Labor Union. Despite their good intentions, they remain oblivious to the skyrocketing health care costs nationwide. They're not alone.
The Nine Lives Award goes to Pete Gillen. We don't mean to be NIT-picky, but things better be looking up for next year.
The Stop, You're Wearing Lamb Chop Award goes to the UGG sheepskin boots trend. No, they do not look good with skirts.
The Calm Out of Chaos award goes to the University Board of Elections. After last year's elections fiasco, the UBE proved that the system can be efficient in the right hands.
The Room with a View Award goes to endowed Lawn rooms. Why are they still around? Then again, how else would the Jeff Society get on the Lawn?
The Don't Make Me Ground You Award goes to Gov. Mark R. Warner. At least someone was able to put our squabbling legislators in their place.
The Multiple Personality Award goes to Council Rep. Tom Gibson, for praising Lundy and her administration in print while lamenting Sullivan's cabinet nominations behind their back. Note to Tom: Might want to go off the record a little sooner in the conversation.
The Cowardly Lion Award goes to President John T. Casteen III for not going public with an opinion about domestic partner benefits. The students have spoken -- now he should too.
The Glue that Holds Us Together Award goes to Sharon Bradley, our office manager. We couldn't do it without her.
The Thanks for Giving up the Sun Award goes to our staff. They sacrifice grades, social lives and any sense of the progression of time by coming down to the basement of Newcomb Hall to put out a paper every day.
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