BRACE yourself, I am about to say something unheard of in the Thomas Jefferson-devoted, orange and blue bleeding, Good Ol' Song singing world of Charlottesville: I never wanted to go to the University of Virginia. I detested the idea so much I wouldn't even finish the tour the three separate times my parents dragged me up here to visit. But circumstances being what they will -- mainly a waiting list spot from Duke, no financial aid from Washington and Lee and William & Mary being but 20 minutes from my house -- I found myself Charlottesville-bound two years ago this August.
That first semester, I called home bemoaning my life at the University -- something no one in my home town could grasp since U.Va. seems to be the Holy Grail of colleges for all in-staters. I made plans to transfer, talked to my friends from home rather then at school and I counted down the days until I would wear some other university's colors.
Fast forward almost two years later, and that same Wahoo-hater is dropping her roommate off at the airport trying not cry because they won't see each other for the next three months. Two days after returning home, my grade-school friends were ready to ship me back to school if they heard one more "we always do it this way in C-ville" one more time. And I seriously doubt my dad enjoyed looking at 13 rolls of film from second semester and hearing a detailed description of every single picture.
So what could have changed a girl who wore Tech shirts her first year into one who can't imagine life beyond the Rotunda? Time and an open mind.
As exciting as it is to start the next phase of your life, it's also pretty scary. Rooming with a kid you have never met, being miles from home, huge classes and the safety net of high school pulled out from under you can lead to a pretty daunting atmosphere, not to mention a million second thoughts about your choice of higher education.
But you have to give it time. Don't go home the first weekend. In fact, don't go home for all of September and even October. I know you want to see the kids back home, sleep in your own bed and pet your dog, but you are missing out on crucial opportunities to build a social network at school. Yes, you can make friends during the weekdays. But nothing quite bonds two first years together like getting lost going to the Downtown Mall, 2 a.m. snacks at the Treehouse after treks down Rugby or quiet movie marathon nights.
When you are feeling so homesick you think you can't breath, don't lock yourself in your room. While AIM may be beckoning you as the magic portal to home, it's not. In fact, you will probably just feel even more alone, because like it or not, your friends are living their own lives and making their own friends at colleges far, far away from you. Open that heavy dorm room door, and venture out in the hall. Find a suite or hallmate
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