We've all done it. It's Friday afternoon, you think to yourself, "You know, if I just focus tomorrow ... I mean, REALLY focus, I bet I could catch up on all my reading in one day. Get up real early, go to the library and just fly through my books." If this has ever worked for anyone, please e-mail me, so I can devote myself to becoming more like you.
8:00 a.m.: Alarm goes off. "Do four weeks of reading in one sitting"-Day begins.
8:01 a.m.: Realize I can't sleep through my alarm's beeping. Time to get up.
12:43 p.m.: Wake up again. I still don't know how that happened.
1:13 p.m.: Dressed, backpack loaded. Time to do the, "I know, I know, it's Saturday and I'm headed to the library, please don't make fun of me"-walk of shame down the Corner.
1:36 p.m.: Arrive at steps of Alderman.
1:37 p.m.: I'm hungry.
1:45 p.m.: Take-out tray from Newcomb ... So I can go somewhere quiet to eat and study at the same time.
1:58 p.m.: Eat on the benches in front of Special Collections Library. No reading.
2:10 p.m.: You know, I still haven't seen the inside of the SCL ...
2:34 p.m.: That was pretty cool.
2:36 p.m.: Arrive at steps of Alderman, again.
2:40 p.m.: Crack open books in the Clue room.
2:41 p.m.: Man, it's too noisy in here.
2:47 p.m.: Floor 5M, this is good.
2:48 p.m.: Nope, it's like a mortuary in here. I'm afraid to breathe loudly.
2:54 p.m.: Bottom-most floor.
2:55 p.m.: You know, there's probably like a million pounds of books over my head right now, waiting to crush it.
2:59 p.m.: Third Floor, that's better.
3:11 p.m.: I bet no one ever reads these theses. It must suck to be a grad student. I mean, aside from having to TA jerks like me who refuse to read for class. Oh right, reading.
3:12 p.m.: Crack open book again.
3:15 p.m.: I mean, there are thousands of theses here. I bet some have never even been opened. I'm gonna open some and validate a grad student's existence.
3:17 p.m.: I'm bored with this, I'm gonna take a break.
3:24 p.m.: Holy crap, this staircase goes all the way from the top to the bottom. There must be like 10 flights of stairs.
3:29 p.m.: Alright, I'm at the top. I'm the king of the stairwell. I stare down to the very bottom.
3:30 p.m. Spit.
3:31 p.m.: Hear spit hit the ground floor. Awesome.
3:35 p.m.: Back to work.
3:36 p.m.: Who writes this crap into the study nooks? "Finals Suck." No, "You suck."
3:54 p.m.: Alright, I've found it. The most defaced study nook on the third floor.
3:57 p.m.: Hit books, for serious this time.
4:01 p.m.: Wouldn't it be neat if you opened up a book here and found a secret note inside? That'd probably make my day.
4:15 p.m.: Sweet. At some point in the future, 15 people's days will have been made. I wonder how long it'll take for my notes to be found.
4:25 p.m.: Go back, replace notes saying "You found me!" with "The crow flies at midnight." Way cooler.
4:38 p.m.: I need some fresh air, I'm gonna take a walk on the Lawn.
5:16 p.m.: How did that squirrel manage to distract me for like 40 minutes?
5:20 p.m.: Hey, I wonder if someone's found one of my notes.
5:25 p.m.: Nope, still there.
5:27 p.m.: I haven't checked my e-mail in so long, I bet I have a bunch now.
5:28 p.m.: Damn. Nothing. I guess everyone's at the game.
5:30 p.m.: I'm gonna update my facebook profile, it's so outdated.
5:31 p.m.: You can join groups? Since when?5:32 p.m.: WWJonD? Sounds dumb.
5:34 p.m.: Poke Edgar Allen Poe.
5:35 p.m.: Alright, that's enough, I'm obsessed with this damn facebook. Time to hit the books, for reals.
5:35 p.m.: Did I just say, "for reals"? Or at the very least, think it?
5:40 p.m.: Back in the study nook. Alright, promise to myself: I will finish these 15 pages of reading by 6:40. One hour. That's definitely doable.
6:43 p.m.: Two hours, make it two hours.
6:44 p.m.: You know what? That WWJonD thing sounded cool. I'm gonna sign up.
6:49 p.m.: I wonder what's going on in the world. I haven't watched the news in forever.
6:54 p.m.: Read week-old Cavalier Daily cover to cover. Hey, it keeps me informed of current events. And some dude's fixation with Back to the Future.
7:15 p.m.: Damn, these crossword puzzles are impossible.
7:35 p.m.: ALRIGHT! No more distractions. I've got to read today, so I can relax later in the week. I wonder what readings I'll have to do in the upcoming days.
7:45 p.m.: Okay, I've filled out my agenda with my classes and designated "reading periods." And color-coded it. With fluorescent Post-it notes.
7:58 p.m.: And now I've filled it out for the rest of the semester.
8:15 p.m.: Oh no. You're kidding me. For the love of God. Have I been reading from the wrong book?
8:16 p.m.: Shuffling papers.
8:17 p.m.: Weeping softly.
8:40 p.m.: Arrive at apartment, throw backpack in corner, where it shall remain for the rest of the weekend.
8:45 p.m.: Write silly-ass column in fit of rage.
So ... how was your day?
Eric can be reached at Cunningham@cavalierdaily.com
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