Dining out well is always a bit of a challenge. Dining out on one of Charlottesville's busiest weekends with your parents, your friends' parents and chatty-but-cheap Aunt Thelma in tow can be an outright marathon. Here are some tips on how to get through Family Weekend.
In true advice-column fashion, the keys to dining with finesse can be summed up with three Cs: Class, Cool and Cash. Add a little luck and you should come out with a full belly -- and your sanity.
Class: So, you've got reservations. Great. One of the classiest things you can do for a booked-to-the-brim restaurant is to show up on time. Some restaurants will give away your table after 15 minutes. Arriving promptly will ensure that you'll get the table you reserved.
If you don't have reservations, well, here's where you'll really have to pull out the charm. The key to the kingdom in this instance is the host or hostess. Smile at him or her sincerely with a look that says, "I sympathize," not "I patronize."
When a table does become available, be flexible. Family Weekend is not the time for nitpicking.
Also, seating may be tight. Assist people in your party, being conscious of things like elbow room and the view for honored guests like parents and grandparents.
The work doesn't stop once you're in your seats. Although your family will be asking lots of questions about your life at school, don't hog the attention. Keep conversation rolling by asking questions about them, too. Spare them the elaborate rundown on acronyms like "AVP," "AFC," "UPC," "StudCo" and the like unless they seem enthralled by such explanations. Above all, find common ground and the Family Weekend chatter will be as smooth as Uncle Steve's bald spot.
Cool: Even with great reservations and the classiest dining companions, something is bound to go wrong. Any number of disasters could ensue, from running late and losing your table to your dad showing up in jeans to a jackets-only dining room and spilling his Dom Perignon.
When things don't go as planned, be the responsible adult and maintain control of your party. If you know your mom takes an hour and a half to get ready, tell her your 7:30 reservations are for 7:00 so she'll magically arrive on time. It's not manipulation -- it's choreography.
Lengthen your fuse, plan adequately and Family Weekend will be an occasion to remember.
Cash: If you're aiming for a great night on the town, class, warmth and sincerity can be less important than cold, hard cash. And on Family Weekend, you can't afford to be stingy.
If you find yourself in this scenario: hungry relatives, limited time, snotty hostess, no reservations, don't underestimate the power of the old "slip her a 20" trick.
If your parents are notoriously bad tippers, bring some cash of your own and tuck it into the server's hand or leave it under a napkin (where it will be found, not thrown away). Why should you care about the 'rents leaving a below-par tip? Even if it's your parents' error, they don't have to show their faces around town the way you do.
(And, for the record, an adequate tip currently runs between 18 and 20 percent. Fifteen percent either sends the message "You did the bare minimum, buddy," or, "The last time I dined out was 1985." Ten percent is never acceptable at a full service restaurant. Never -- unless you're purposely punishing the server, in which case, speak to the manager before stiffing.)
When the check comes, pay attention, stop any conversation, make eye contact with the person who will likely be paying, lean for your purse or wallet and offer to pay your share. A simple "May I?" will imply the right thing
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