What are you doing for the rest of your life?
All those who are 21 or near it like to think they are the most important people in the world. Some are full of energy and have the desire to make the world a better place. Some are determined to make more money and do better than any other generation yet.
It's interesting to have the chance to step outside of my life once every two weeks and think, trying to draw together a theme to our hazy existence. I realize there is a great chance I am full of it. But at least I try.
I have many theories about our generation. First of all, we are what the older people like to call the "entitled" generation. The majority of us are educated, have more than we need, and expect, well, whatever we want to come out of our lives to actually happen. We all expect 50G or more per year jobs the year after we graduate. I bet most of us can't imagine living off of a budget so detailed it counts the number of cigs you can smoke, much like our parents did.
We are also the generation that coined the concept and term of hooking up. No generation before us could capitalize on the prominent use of contraceptives and sexual liberation ideas of the hippy movement. Even though STDs and AIDS are far from gone, this generation in particular walks around like we aren't going to contract them. With no consciousness of the risk of long-term effects, and the social toleration of smooching whomever you desire with no commitment (a debatable topic), we learn that love isn't necessary for sex or sexual stuff and anyone who tells you it is, is probably 40 or religious.
But, even in light of this sexual culture, which is broadening to the younger and younger ages of 14, 13, even 12 (yes, 12), I think there's a good chance we are going to turn around a few things, including divorce rates.
The logic doesn't seem to flow that a generation that likes non-committed sex is a generation that loathes divorce, but I find the more I talk to kids who grew up in divorced families, the more prepared they are to marry once and only once. It seems that since 50% of marriages fail these days, there are a great number of kids who have seen the effects of divorce, the changes it can create, the money issues, the relationship issues and on and on. Many of these children have thus vowed to themselves they will marry only once. And this self-awareness and promise to the self might be the golden ticket to success.
On the other hand, this theory could easily blow up in my optimistic face. We need to come clean with the fact that in the non-definition that is our relational schema, we are training ourselves to cut and run when we are bored. We are setting up patterns of thinking, "If I can't get attention right now, I'm out," neglecting, of course, that there are only more and more sacrifices which have to be made as we grow older and older. Attention, excitement and the chills inevitably turn into appreciation, contentment and real love.
But in our non-committed, assumingly non-love-based escapades, are we giving up on the idea that this future commitment is possible and even desirable? Or are we, quite honestly, not even thinking about it?
I don't know how our generation will be remembered. All I know is that we are creating our legacy every day, especially now that we are at the age of no excuse. We can vote, we can take on social causes, we can sit on our butts and play video games. We can wait for the 50G a year offer; we can work as missionaries in Haiti; we can do anything, really, except rent a car.
In the process of taking classes, finding jobs, being blind to a lot of reality and messing around (which is what these four years are for), someone is bound to ask you, "What do you want to do?" I propose, in all of its corny nature, it's time we start thinking less about the job and more aboutour lives. Forget what you want to do in the next few years. It will all take care of itself -- as long as we are responsible enough to start thinking about what we want to do and who we want to be -- for the rest of our lives.
Callan's column runs biweekly on Tuesdays. She can be reached at blount@cavalierdaily.com.
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