It's 2 a.m. and the guy across from you at the beer pong table is swaying back and forth, talking big game about his skills. Chin tucked, eyes halfway open and knees weak, your eyes follow his motion as he shows off his few chest hairs to intimidate his opponent. Your gaze shifts over bright blue pants to a pair of geriatric shoes hopefully acquired from the Salvation Army, but most likely from his grandfather.
All of the sudden, you ask yourself the obvious question: Where did this kid come from?
The answer lies in Parents' Weekend: A University tradition in the fall and also one that the Greek community has adopted in order to introduce their parents to new friends and prove that all the dues money is actually going somewhere, even if it's primarily to kegs and food. But whether you are Greek or not, chances are you have invited your parents up for a weekend or been introduced to others'. Either way, we've all had the chance to answer the question above.
Meeting the parents of friends or a significant other can be an enlightening experience. Yes, we spend a lot of time with the people in our college life, but we really have no concept of how these people got here. Unlike our younger years, our history with college counterparts is limited to four years, which is often only long enough to scratch the surface.
So when Mom and Dad roll into town, context and understanding accompany free dinners. More often than not, two realizations occur: Both the parents and their child are strikingly similar, or the two are very much opposites. Kid A might be the most random, loud, bordering on obnoxious person you know, and his whole family is quiet and reserved. Or, the same kid comes from a long line of obnoxiousness that quickly gets you kicked out of Farmington Country Club.
Sloppy roommates often come from obsessive compulsive parents who spent their lives following their kids around with a sponge or a family who survived combined messiness by maids.
Needless to say, meeting another's parents is stressful, specifically in the date context. When you are a platonic or hook up date, the seriousness of meeting your friend/ smooch-buddy's parents imposes a seriousness upon the relationship that both parties have to awkwardly navigate. "So, Suzie, are you and my son dating? No? Well, why not?" Yeah, that's really fun.
But then, if you are dating the kid in question, the parents inevitably try to measure you up to the overly high standard they place upon their kids. Every dad hopes for his daughter to date an Eagle Scout with short, meticulously combed hair and "sir" attached to each sentence. And every mom expects his son to court the "good" girl who is entertaining enough to make conversation but not so strong a personality that she becomes more interesting to the son than the mom.
Needless to say, repeating sir all night and referencing your resume in order to impress starts to feel more like a seven-hour interview than a date.
Nonetheless, meeting parents is fun. At some point, no matter how perfect you want to seem or the weekend to be, reality and all its imperfections manifest themselves in you and your friend across the beer pong table, who is screaming profanities at another kids' parents in the spirit of competition. Plus, meeting a friend's parents allows you more understanding of how a person became so clever, why your roommate can't operate a broom or what your friend or significant other might turn out to be like, or be the complete opposite of, when he grows up.
So the trick to handling the stress, insights and entertainment is to assume your best self for as long as you can, intentionally get to know these new addendums to your life and file away all the embarrassing stories the parents tell so that one day, when all your pals are hanging out, you can remind them of your buddy's childhood speech problems or bathroom antics.
And, if all else fails, remember your counterpart-across-the-beer-pong-table's behavior: You can't do any worse than he is in the impression department, and at least you're wearing cooler shoes.
Callan's column runs bi-weekly on Tuesdays. She can be reached at blount@cavalierdaily.com.
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