The new year is well under way, but a few Life columnists took a look back at 2006 (in their own special way) to see what was popular, and what they hope will stay in the past.
HOT: Retirement
University alum and New York Giants running back Tiki Barber announced that this NFL season will be his last before he enters the world of broadcasting. What he doesn't realize is that listening to 30 minutes of John Madden's indecipherable babbling in the booth is worse punishment than he ever received on the playing field.
NOT: Continued employment
Inexplicably, Al Groh, who made approximately $1.2 million for every Cavalier first down last season, will be back for his seventh season as head coach. The athletic department sincerely regrets putting a clause in Groh's contract that allows him to stay until every position on the coaching staff is filled by a direct descendant.
HOT: Coming out of the closet
Actor Neil Patrick Harris and former *NSYNC singer Lance Bass made headlines last year by announcing they were gay. After their careers began to dwindle, both celebrities rebounded in 2006. Harris is currently starring in the CBS hit "How I Met Your Mother" and, for the first time in six years, Justin Timberlake answered one of Bass' phone calls.
NOT: Delaying the inevitable
Pop sensation Clay Aiken continued his commitment to remain the most obviously gay heterosexual man in America. Aiken was also proud of the fact that his record sales quadrupled in 2006, a rise largely because of his newfound employment as a sales clerk at Sam Goody.
HOT: New E-School building
Wilsdorf Hall, the new home of the University's Nanotechnology and Chemical Engineering departments, opened its doors last fall.
NOT: Antisocial behavior
Engineering students now have an additional 99,000 square feet of space where they can avoid human contact.
HOT: Scientology weddings
Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes tied the knot in November. Among the guests were John Travolta, David Beckham and the Grand High Lord Xenu.
NOT: White trash divorces
Britney Spears and Kevin Federline called it quits, citing irreconcilable talent deficiencies. Three weeks later, their child filed for legal emancipation from both parents, citing, "Seriously, do I really have to explain myself?"
HOT: Top-flight performers
The University's 15,000-seat, $150-million John Paul Jones Arena has already seen the likes of Dave Matthews Band, Eric Clapton and Kenny Chesney. The Red Hot Chili Peppers, Justin Timberlake and Billy Joel are just some of the upcoming headliners.
NOT: D-list novelty acts
With an influx of youngsters eager to see "Disney on Ice" at JPJ, Charlottesville's average reading level plummeted. The literacy rate only got worse a few weeks later when Larry the Cable Guy attracted thousands of his loyal fans to the venue.
HOT: Outstanding medical care
The University Hospital was once again honored as one of the best hospitals in the nation.
NOT: Obscure disease epidemics
Mumps, E. coli and traces of bubonic plague found their way into the Charlottesville community and continue to threaten our health. College students long for the days when herpes and the clap were all they had to worry about.
HOT: Political snafu
Former Sen. George Allen (R-Va.) choked when he lost in a heated race to Democrat Jim Webb.
NOT: Fraternity snafu
A pledge at the St. Anthony Hall fraternity choked during a purported hazing ceremony involving a "pill/line," according to a leaked e-mail.
HOT: Usage of the word "snafu"
NOT: Failing to use the word "snafu" when even remotely possible
HOT: New eateries
Raising Cane's and Chipotle, the McDonald's-owned chain, both opened up shop in town this fall.
NOT: Clogged arteries
While fried chicken still holds its own as the classic heart failure-inducing snack, the geniuses at McDonald's managed to scientifically engineer a 16,000-calorie burrito.
HOT: Justin Timberlake
He brought sexy back ...
NOT: Fergie
... And she scared it away again. "London Bridge" is falling down -- it's too bad she isn't standing underneath it.
HOT: Sequels
Among the wildly successful cinematic sequels in 2006 were "Pirates of the Caribbean II: Dead Man's Chest," "Ice Age: The Meltdown" and "Jackass: Number Two."
NOT: Sixquels
"Rocky Balboa," the sixth installment of the "Rocky" movie franchise, featured a 60-year-old boxer (Sylvester Stallone) attempting an unlikely comeback while simultaneously keeping up with his bimonthly prostate exams. A total of 25 minutes of the film consists entirely of Rocky driving cautiously under the speed limit, sending his granddaughters birthday checks for $7 and complaining the gym is "too drafty."
HOT: Graduation speeches
Kooky author Tom Wolfe addressed the graduating class of 2006 with a riveting speech on upside-down, freak-out, kaleidoscope, dreamboat, psychedelic kiwi, groovy, electric, teleportation device ... something.
NOT: Graduation speeches
Basically, he was supposed to speak at the Insane Southern Authors Convention in Savannah, Ga., but the seersucker feather in his also seersucker hat caught on fire and required an emergency landing in Charlottesville, where he lucked out and found a box of acid waiting for him behind the podium.
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