The Beatles once sang, "I get by with a little help from my friends." After Yoko, that philosophy didn't hold up so well, but somehow I still have faith. Over the next few months, as my friends and I prepare to start our separate paths in life, I realize more than ever what my friends have come to mean to me.
In high school, everyone swears they'll never forget each other, they'll call each other every weekend, they'll see each other every break. As we've grown older, we've realized those claims were unrealistic. That's not to say I'm not still friends with a few people from my high school, but the fact is that I've lost touch with many people, too.
College friends are a different breed. You didn't grow up with them, and your backgrounds may be completely different, but somehow the bonds you form over these four years mean more than most friendships from grades one to 12. That's because you finally befriend people who share your beliefs, ambitions and sense of humor. In college, friends are no longer a matter of habit.
I suppose the friendships I've made here are a testament to the truly unique experience of college life. Technically, you're between families -- you've outgrown your total dependence on your parents, and yet you are at least a few years from starting a family of your own. And so your friends become that family. They're the people you can lean on when an exam went badly and they offer a shoulder to cry on when a boy or girl breaks your heart.
My theory on friends becoming in-between family was proven, as far as I'm concerned, when I studied abroad last semester. Not only was I away from my family, I was thousands of miles and several time zones away. Phone service was unreliable and e-mail took a few days for a response. My housemates and I had no choice but to rely on each other. Not only were we dealing with the normal new-environment issues commonly experienced by incoming first-year students, but we were also faced with adjusting to an entirely different culture at the same time. Nothing bonds you like surviving rolling black-outs, attempting to use public taxis and trying to imitate accents.
Coming back to Virginia was just as good. I got so many phone calls welcoming me home I thought I was going to run out of phone minutes in the first week.
Back stateside, my housemates here in Charlottesville and I have also formed a family. Sure, we're dysfunctional -- what family do you know that isn't? We bicker and fight, but we also share our leftovers, cuddle on the couch while watching movies and worry when someone doesn't come home.
I think it's easy to see that your college friends are not your high school friends. You share experiences over these four years that no one else can quite relate to, whether it's your parents who can't understand the college lifestyle or your friends from high school who went to difference colleges and are having unique experiences of their own. Chances are your college friends will be a part of your wedding party or godparents for your children. Both of my parents have remained friends with people from their college days, so I have a lot of hope that I can do the same.
As much as our professors would like to think otherwise, when we look back on our college years 50 years from now, we won't remember which author made which argument about which cultural movement. Sure, our academic education will stick with us for years to come, but for most of us, our careers will be the real instruction manual for the world.
Instead what we'll remember are those nights we stayed up talking with first-year roommates until 4 a.m. Or holding our best friends' hair back after too many rounds of drinking games. Or, more likely, when they held back ours.
If you haven't figured it out by now, my columns might get a little sappy as my days at the University come to a close. I promise I'll try to keep up my normal levels of sass and sarcasm. I will not, however, share my leftover macaroni and cheese with you. That's what your friends are for.
Laura's column runs weekly alternating Thursdays and Fridays. She can be reached at lsisk@cavalierdaily.com.
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