Sunday evening, 10:30 p.m. The big game just ended. I'm freakin' exhausted. The only break from the four-hour extravaganza was the halftime show, which was spent watching X2 and admiring the gorgeous Rebecca Romijn in that stunning blue suit rather than sitting through a way-too-long performance by Prince. But I digress.
NFL contests normally take a strenuous toll on my mental and physical being. Whether it's the Redskins sending me on an emotional roller coaster from suicide to pure euphoria with a blocked kick and field goal on an untimed down -- I'll never let that one die -- or my vocal chords being completely shot from screaming all afternoon at the television set, Sundays are a full workout.
The Super Bowl, however, takes the stress to a whole different level. I get no break at commercials.
Normally, commercials are a critical time to heat up some popcorn, check fantasy football stats or make a pit stop at the restroom.
But during the most-watched U.S. television broadcast of the year, the commercials are nearly as important, if not more important, than the game itself.
I wasn't concerned about missing the kickoff for the Sunday evening showdown. I just had to make sure I made it out of the shower in time for the first commercial break.
Last year's commercials cost $2.5 million for a 30-second spot. Many fans (especially of the female variety) just tune in for the advertisements. (Speaking of female fans, do you notice how they always comment on the player's looks or uniforms? Ladies, we don't care!)
As soon as the Bears' Devin Hester finished off his electrifying 92-yard opening kickoff return with a touchdown, the first break arose.
(Pause here for dramatic effect.)
At this point all conversation immediately ceased and my roommates and I turned up our attention levels so we would not miss a precious word of each commercial.
While the overall 2007 Super Bowl commercials receive a grade somewhere in the B/B- range, there were hits by careerbuilder.com and, as usual, Bud Light came through with some classics.
After success at last year's Super Bowl with the monkeys running the office, the largest online job site in the U.S. struck again in '07.
This year, their three ads took place on an island resembling the set of the TV series "Lost". The "Promotion Pit" spot gets top marks as the employees fight each other and the delivery guy, who doesn't even work at the office, for a raise. The "Darts" commercial also was an instant classic. We all felt for the three poor souls who got netted for the volunteer training seminar. (It's even scarier as a fourth-year.) And we can't forget the "Performance Review" ±-- when the Asian guy gets the atomic wedgie, that's just priceless.
Bud Light, as usual, had solid 30-second promos. The "Rock, Paper, Scissors" fight for the Bud Light and the "Reception" with the cowboy auctioneer as the wedding officiator garnered significant chuckles. These weren't as great as last year's spot, when they hid the beer in the office to increase employer morale. My roommates and I laughed so hard that we decided we had to go out and purchase some Bud Light at halftime. Aren't we just the advertisers' dream viewers?
Super Bowl XLI was also graced by a brand new technique used by Doritos -- the contest for a home produced 30-second Doritos commercial to be aired at the championship game. The employee who came up with this genius idea at the Frito-Lay Corporation deserves an immediate promotion. Not only did Doritos not have to spend money or manpower to produce the commercial, but fans were instantly eager to see what the creative juices of our fellow average Americans could generate.
The lines "Salsa Ve-r-r-rde" and "Blazing Buffalo and Ranch, Getty-Up" will be stuck in my memory every time I see bags of Doritos at the grocery store (not to mention the facial expressions of the women at the checkout counter). We're taking bets on her accent. I'm voting she's from Wisconsin.
We did manage to catch the game as well, which was marred by turnover after turnover in the soaked confines of Dolphin Stadium.
It was not one of the down-to-the-wire thrillers we're accustomed to this decade after watching Patriot QB Tom Brady and his late game heroics. Nevertheless, the end of the game still had our undivided attention, as fourth quarter commercials are completely fair game for coffee table talk this entire week.
After all, somebody has to explain what godaddy.com was thinking.
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