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Delayed departure

Airline delays were at their worst this summer due to a grab bag of bad weather, congestion, air carrier negligence and divine intervention. This affected millions of Americans, especially those who flew into or out of the nation's major airports. It also continued to set the standard of delays being the norm rather than the exception when it comes to air travel.

As a frequent flyer this summer, I've learned a thing or two about what you can do when your flight gets delayed. Although nobody likes having his itinerary thrown off course, there are a number of techniques you can use to minimize your unease.

First off, you should check the weather forecast 24 hours ahead of time to look for signs of hazardous weather and plan ahead. Key words in the weather report that might indicate a delay include thunderstorms, strong winds, fog, scattered showers, sunny, and mostly or partly cloudy. If you see any of these terms in the forecast, phone ahead to your destination and advise them that you might be several hours late. If they ask why, just laugh and say something along the lines of "Oh, you're so naïve."

Upon arrival to the airport, the first thing you should check are the monitors with departing flight numbers, gates and times. You can easily find these monitors by following the sounds of groans and frustrated sighs from your fellow passengers as they learn the status of their ill-fated flights.

Find the row on the screen containing your flight's information and check the right-most column to see if your flight is "delayed" or "on time." If your flight is "delayed," you should take note of the new departure time and gate. Continue checking the status of your flight every 20 minutes, as it is likely to get delayed or moved to a different gate several more times. If your flight is "on time," then you are in for even more of a headache. "On time" only means that your flight is likely to be so messed up that the air traffic controllers can't even make a guess as to how long it will be postponed, if it even takes off at all.

The next step is to find something to do with yourself for the hours you'll spend waiting in the airport. If you brought along a music player and some headphones, you can simply sit in one of the uncomfortable seats next to your gate and listen to your favorite tunes. Of course, this means that you'll miss hearing the announcements over speakerphone, but I've found that this is merely an added bonus. I have yet to hear a speakerphone announcement at an airport that brought anything besides bad news or false hope.

If you'd rather walk around, you'll find the airport has a wealth of stores and restaurants. You'll see many of the same chain stores that you see in the outside world, except their airport counterparts will have 50-percent longer lines and 50-percent higher prices. Also, bookstores and magazine stands flourish in airports thanks to crowds of stranded passengers with nothing better to do than read. Best of all, there are the duty-free shops. They reign supreme not because of their assortment of liquor, tobacco, cosmetics and other luxuries, nor their tax-free prices. Rather, it is because "duty-free" sounds a lot like "doodie-free," and you can stand outside the store and let the secondgrader in you have a nice, hearty chuckle.

Lastly, if you are with friends, you can make a game (and a buck) from all the delay craziness. All you have to do is make bets on whether your flight will take off after or before a certain time. I was thoroughly entertained by this when my flight from Chicago to Philadelphia this summer was delayed from 7:30 p.m. until 1:30 a.m. I lost some money by betting that our flight would take off before 10:20 p.m, and then won it all back by reversing my position hours later and betting that the flight would take off after 12:30 a.m.

So, if you're going to be flying anytime soon, take heed of my advice. Just remember the old saying, air travel isn't as bad as they say -- it's probably worse.

Daniel is a Cavalier Daily Life columnist. His column runs biweekly on Tuesdays. He can be reached at mcnally@cavalierdaily.com

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