Many people mistakenly think that a date starts whenever you arrive at the desired location of fun that was planned for the evening. This theory, however, is not giving proper value to one of the more pivotal periods over the course of the date: the drive there.
Now, while it is always good to keep a healthy conversation going during the ride, this can usually be achieved through "filler" questions. "Filler" questions are those that require answers just long enough to take up a desired amount of time, such as "How was your day?" "How did the test go?" or "Did you see our basketball team lose again?" By using such queries, you can keep the car ride comfortable while at the same time leaving the better topics of discussion for later that night.
A more important aspect of the ride that every guy needs to take note of is what type of music will be jamming on your stereo. Will you play the cool jams of Barry or get saucy with Shakira? Is Boyz II Men your group of choice, or does N'Sync win the day? Whatever your preference in musical genres, it should be noted that what you play sends a message. Though what message you want to send can vary from case to case, I feel it is necessary to keep from communicating through the following three types of songs.
1) The Stalker. The prime example of this type of song is "Every Breath You Take" by Sting and the Police. More recently, however, there are examples such as "Invisible" by Clay Aiken and "Bloody Valentine" by Good Charlotte. The lyrics to these songs are, in a nutshell, fairly creepy and should be avoided at all cost for their tendency to make a situation awkward. Because, at the end of the day, what date wants to know you wish you were invisible so you could just watch her in her room. I mean, to each his own -- but that's weird.
2) Dirty Pop Songs. These were made popular in the 90s by the likes of Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera and include "... Baby One More Time" and "Genie in a Bottle." The one thing all of these songs have in common is that they are sung by innocent (or formerly innocent) girls but have a very obvious sexual overtone. That's not to say that these songs aren't fun to dance and sing to in the privacy of your own home when no one is watching (not that I do), but they are just not good first-date jams.
3) Mariah Carey songs. What? No Mariah? No. No Mariah. She is awful. There is no place for Mariah Carey in the car or on the dance floor or even in the shower. I am not one to believe in censorship, but it seems like if we are going to phone tap then we may as well shut down whoever it is that keeps giving her a microphone. "Love Takes Time"? Corny. "Thank God I Found You"? She might not have him for long if she keeps singing like that. And did I mention that her last album was called The Emancipation of Mimi? Enough said.
Thus, as far as these three types of songs go, it is your duty and your obligation to close the book on them when in a dating scenario. So what should you play? My three recommendations to you are "Fast Car" by Tracy Chapman, "Two Step" by Dave Matthews and "Goodbye Horses" by Q. Lazzurus. These three are fun and eclectic and will always put your date at ease at least half of the time.
Music is an important part of all of our lives, whether we are illegally downloading it, screaming it with our friends at the top of our lungs or just sitting and letting someone with some killer pipes spell out what it is you're thinking. Thus, when you're on a date, try to pick those songs that will say what you are thinking and feeling. Or just play some P. Diddy. That's good too.
Andy's column runs biweekly Mondays. He can be reached at taylor@cavalierdaily.com.
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