As I've been meandering back and forth to class lately, I've been thinking a lot about what all this high-brow learning stuff is gearing me up for, and I'm sure that this applies to just about everyone. What will I do with a college education? Will I save the world one classroom at a time? Will I write books that inspire? Will I sit behind a desk and wait for payday? There are endless possibilities out there for young college students to think about, and sometimes it's kind of fun to think I could be anywhere and everywhere in two years, no strings attached. I guess what I'm trying to say is that college gives everyone an overwhelming sense of freedom and empowerment to do and go where he or she wants.
"So what," you might be asking yourselves, "does this have to do with dating?" Well, right in the middle of many of my pleasant daydreams of hiking in Tibet and declaring world peace, my mind often wanders to the fact that people around me are getting engaged. Let me just say that again. People are getting engaged. Like engaged to be married. Like lifelong commitment, we're settling down, no-thanks-we're-all-good-over-here kind of engaged. I remember a time when it was a viable conversation to talk about how impressive hitting the three-month mark was, and that time was the summer before first year. But somehow in the last year and a half my reaction to the thought of people my own age getting married has downgraded from "WTF? Are you joking?" to an "Oh ... well that's cool. I'm glad to hear it."
Maybe this is a natural progression, but at least for the likes of my roommate (don't tell him because I didn't really ask -- I just wanted someone else in the same boat with me) and I, this is a pretty weird situation. I thought college is supposed to be some sort of ramp to the wild and crazy adventure of the early 20s. Now I've come to find out that plenty of people are buckling down just as they're starting to gear up. I'm not saying marriage is a trap that grabs you and keeps you from doing all that crazy stuff you always dreamed of as a kid, but at the very least it's a seat belt. And though a seat belt might be a good thing -- and a thing that keeps you safe -- all I want to be at the moment is unsafe. I want a little bit of danger mixed with a whole lot of passion for life and two to three Chipotle burritos a day. I want to ride a motorcycle across the country and backpack in the wild and craft my own set of bow and arrows and bring down a wild boar (sorry to all you environmentalist friends of the boar). And it's not that these things are necessarily solo acts, but it just seems to me like my dreams have almost always been summed up by me standing somewhere on my own, looking out at something amazing and knowing that it's just me and my thoughts standing there. So I guess it's just a little weird to think of someone else being photo-shopped into this picture perfect idea of serenity.
I'm not entirely sure what my conclusion to this article is. It could be that I am obviously not ready to get married or it could be that maybe I don't know enough about life to be able to comprehend what actual marriage is like. Maybe it's not like a seat belt. Maybe it's like a pogo stick or a game of dodgeball. Who's to say really? All I know is that I feel older every time I get up in the morning because I know that in time I won't be able to get up and go somewhere on a whim with some adventure waiting for me just around the corner. And for a free spirit like me, that's kind of a downer. And what's an even bigger downer is that I just sold out by calling myself a free spirit. Downer.
Andy's column runs biweekly Mondays. He can be reached at taylor@cavalierdaily.com.
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