I’ve been staring at the screen for about 20 minutes trying to figure out how best to express what I think of Terrence Howard’s new album, Shine Through It. Let’s try putting it this way — all I can hear right now is the quiet, subtly annoying rattle of my air conditioner, and I prefer it that way.
You may recognize Howard’s name from a different part of the entertainment business. An actor whose resume I happen to highly respect, he’s been in movies such as 2004’s Crash, 2005’s Hustle & Flow and 2008’s Iron Man. Though he did some vocal work for Hustle & Flow, he did not appear in the song “It’s Hard Out Here for a Pimp,” which won a Grammy for Best Original Song. Nevertheless, every time I see Terrence Howard’s name on a cast list, I’m slightly more inclined to see the movie. Too bad the same effect occurred when I saw his name on iTunes.
When I first noticed Howard’s name on the new releases list, I was intrigued but hopeful that maybe, just maybe, he’d make the transition from screen actor to music artist with relative ease. Yes, you heard right, Howard is yet another actor who has made the decision that trying his hand at the music business would be good for his career. Maybe it’s been a lifelong dream and now the resources are finally available, everything’s falling into place perfectly, whatever. Well congratulations, Terrence — in my opinion you’re right up there with Lindsay Lohan, Hilary Duff and, more recently, Hayden Panettiere.
I tried listening to the album first on iTunes, using the 30-second clips to get a small sampling of the album before taking the plunge into listening to it in its entirety. Needless to say, I was disappointed from the beginning. A considerate iTunes customer, however, warned me in a review that the 30-second clips “don’t give you enough.” Assuming they were right, though still harboring some doubts, I used my roommate’s Rhapsody account instead of buying the album — just as a precaution — and started to listen.
This is where it gets difficult. Honestly, I don’t know where to start, or what song to pick on, so I’ll give you a step-by-step process on how to create your own Terrence Howard song. First, read the first paragraph of this review out loud and somewhat hurriedly, in a raspy voice, and make sure that you’re slightly off-beat to whatever rhythm you’ve picked. Then, add random, high-pitched big band noises — a cheap keyboard with the “big band” setting will probably work. Then get louder and louder until your voice cracks, return to the original intensity and wrap up the song. Disbelievers, refer to “No. 1 Fan” — I’m not making this up. Really, the only halfway decent song on Shine Through It is “Spanish Love Affair,” but that doesn’t have any vocals in it. “Mr. Johnson’s Lawn” is a favorite, but mostly because it’s chorus. “Stay off Mr. Johnson’s lawn” is just a ridiculously funny phrase. Or maybe it’s sad, I haven’t decided yet. Moral of the story is this — Shine Through It is pretty painful to listen to.
As I’m getting to the end of my first negative review I’m feeling sort of guilty, I must confess. Have I been too harsh? What if I’ve completely missed the point of this album and it really is as “real and from the soul” as iTunes user “simply j” says it is? If someone disagrees with my portrayal, please contact me and explain my mistake. I’ll be here, listening to my air conditioner in the meantime.
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