When does night end and morning begin? I woke up this past Tuesday morning to a moonlit sky and “Shake It” playing on the radio. It was 4:30 a.m.
Coming back this semester, I knew life would be different. But though change may be inevitable, you can rest assured traditions are still alive and well here at the University. I was lucky enough to partake in one such tradition at 5 a.m. Inauguration Day. And although this particular event may have been small in comparison with the momentous occasion of the day, it caused me to welcome a new mentality into my life.
Where was I? Ah yes, the moonlit sky. I woke up after only pressing snooze once, which may not sound like a big deal, but is epic in my world. I got dressed in less than five minutes, jeans and a sweatshirt with Under Armour and wool socks to boot. The winter air did not feel as bitter as it did a couple of days ago when it was in the negative degrees, and the walk was short and uninterrupted. A lack of traffic and people granted me the opportunity to sing on my walk, something I love doing. After crossing JPA and Main Street, walking along the Range rooms, and passing SERP and DU among others, I made it to my destination and saw familiar faces.
Alongside my pledge brothers, painting Beta Bridge in the tundra did not seem so bad. We laughed and complained about the weather, cursed the names of those in our pledge class who did not show up and appreciated the warmth that was to come after packing up, going home and going back to bed. I had never painted Beta Bridge before and now that I have done it, I feel no need to do it again. We advertised for rush and spray-painted praises of our bigs. In the midst of it all, we bonded.
The whole process only took about 45 minutes, but I couldn’t go back to bed, so I decided to try to check off another thing from my list of pre-graduation activities. Someone once told me that Bodo’s opened at 6 a.m., but I can tell you that person is a liar. I gave up my spot in a car to walk there, only to approach a dark building with an hours sign that read: Monday-Friday 7 a.m. to 8 p.m. It was five minutes before 6 a.m., so I stood outside of Starbucks and settled for a Pumpkin Spice latte instead.
There I passed a homeless man who asked me if I had any change to spare, and unfortunately I said no. It was more of a knee-jerk reaction than anything else, but I still felt bad; I did in fact have change, enough change to order Starbucks while this man may not have had food. Why did I lie to him? I was obviously going against my values and being selfish, but I couldn’t bring myself to call out to him.
This made me think about an experience I had a little more than a year ago. I was at the Fashion Square Mall bus stop talking to a homeless man who did not know what he would do the rest of his day because he had nowhere to go and nowhere to sleep. He seemed like a nice guy and he talked about the army, suggesting that if he had not enlisted, his life might have turned out differently. He never showed signs of disrespect, but when the bus arrived, I quickly got on and went directly to the back to avoid sitting next to him. Why? I don’t quite know.
But while I was back there, I started eating the M&M-filled cookie I had just bought from Mrs. Fields. When I took the first bite, I realized how hard the cookie was. I almost lost it. I got so angry I wanted to scream or throw the cookie out the window or get off of the bus, go back inside, and demand another cookie, but instead I pouted in my seat and sulked for a while before finally acknowledging how ridiculous my reaction was. I felt so awful for feeling the way I did because not more than five minutes beforehand, I had been listening to a man who had nothing but remained joyous. I, on the other hand, was ready to give up on everything because I did not get a soft cookie. That is when I learned the lesson of humility.
I learn life lessons every day, some in the classroom — most not — and whenever I start feeling organized and in control, a new experience reveals how little I actually know. Why is it that painting a bridge feels more natural than helping another individual? I do not think of myself as a selfish person and I think I give back to the community appropriately, but I still have much to learn. I often ignore the most meaningful things in life, taking them for granted instead of appreciating them, while I stress about the little things that don’t deserve even a minute of my time. I need to be more accepting and modest and less judgmental. I suppose regular lessons in humility are in store for the future.
Ian’s column runs biweekly Thursdays. He can be reached at i.smith@cavalierdaily.com.
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