We all have those acquaintances from class or dorms at whom we smile awkwardly, nod or just pretend not to notice as we pass them on Grounds. Sometimes there’s definitely a reason to avoid a conversation. But there are also those who we genuinely like but just haven’t had the time, energy or motivation to get to know.
Eventually, even some of our encounters with the acquaintances we like become awkward because we never go deeper than, “Hey, how are you?” and “What’s up?” as we pass each other on the way to class. Interesting people become uncomfortable annoyances, and at the sight of them, we put in our headphones and look the other direction. Eventually, we forget their names. Did we ever even know them?
What, then, are we to do?
In an effort to remind ourselves just how important people and daily interactions are, Project Happiness held a dinner to which each member invited an acquaintance whom we wanted to get to know better. The goal was to turn a casual acquaintance into an actual friend — and thereby have one fewer dreaded sidewalk interaction. We played telestrations — Google it, it’s totally worth your time — ate Mexican food and learned more about each other’s lives.
Though the meal was a one night, random conglomeration of our University community, our reviews were glowing. “I invited someone I had met 15 minutes prior to when the dinner started,” one of our members said. “The look on [her] face when I asked her to join me was that of bewilderment, joy and excitement…Simply including someone can do wonders to a person’s self-esteem.”
Even for those lifelong friendships, however, small gestures like this can help reaffirm that connection. “Although my date was a long-time friend, she’s one of those people I never, ever see at school because she works so hard,” another member said. “Though I wasn’t learning new things about her, it was nice to hear what is going on in her life that I’ve been missing out on. It made me realize the importance of taking the time out of everyday life for friends to let them know that you care how they are doing and really value their friendship. “
This simple event reminded all the participants of the importance of relationships and helped strengthen both pre-existing and new ones.
So, whether you like your awkward sidewalk-mate or not, they are sharing your sidewalk, your life and your world. Next time, we dare you to do more than smile or look away: try inviting just one of them to dinner!
As always, we welcome any new members. If you wish to be a part of the Happiness Group, send us an email at happiness@virginia.edu.
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