I am the product of a technology boom. It defines my generation and by association, I am now scared it defines me. Never before has communication been easier, with cell phones, email, Skype, Facebook, Google Chat, Instagram, Pinterest, Snapchat, blogs, Twitter — the list goes on. These forms of social media scream, “Post your lives for all to see and all to know!” The National Security Agency doesn’t even need to dig to unfold your life story anymore.
Facebook offers an outlet for us to formulate an idealized version of our lives for others to judge and get to know us in a meaningless and superficial way. There is a pressure to upload photos, post your thoughts and prove you have an exciting life, but by sharing memories on Facebook, they become less and less your own.
Besides a friend losing a relative or dog, there is never anyone sad on Facebook, nor do we ever see someone’s hives rash. The need to perfect our lives online leads to a disappointment with the reality.
Pictures can mask true events. Captions can create illusions of false happiness. A friend posted a cutesy couple photo with a caption, “I love this guy.” But those who know her best answered that late night call she made while bawling — his verbal abuse had reached a peak. Can you imagine if she’d posted a photo with the caption, “We were actually on the rocks this night.” That would be a first.
Having recently deleted my Facebook, I’ve found myself inundated with questions about my motives. Was it because of drama? A boy? Bad grades? Honestly — none of these. Though many things ultimately motivated my decision, I was at least a little bit unsettled by the thought of my mother and father on Facebook, befriending my friends and trying to be funny while commenting on my statuses. I never laughed.
Mostly I want to conserve time, to which my roommate said, “I use it just when I am bored, you know, to fill the time.” But the time to fill becomes larger; suddenly you’re finding time in class to fill time, time waiting in line at the grocery store, time at a somewhat awkward party, time walking to class, and time from all the moments that make up your life.
Another question I normally receive is, “Well why don’t you go on it less?” Thank you for assuming I have personal restraint, but my housemates don’t even leave fresh cookies out in the kitchen anymore. The pressure of checking Facebook too great for me; it’s the same pressure I feel to check my phone.
Using social media begins to change the way you appreciate moments. Do you take a picture and think, “This will be great to post on Instagram?” Before I deleted my Facebook, I thought in terms of social media, not in appreciation of a memory kept in the form of a photo for my own personal enjoyment, or for framing on a wall.
Before everyone jumps to denigrate me in the comments, let me make a caveat. I have an Instagram and I may reactivate Facebook one day, but the growing focus on social media instead of on real life is a trend worth examining.
Are we avoiding life when we sign up for social media? Does social media make us happier? Are we becoming a slave to our phones and Facebook, while we prostitute ourselves in the digitized world with unknown repercussions? The answers will require a much more individualized assessment, but for this gal, it got to be too much.
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