Ah yes, U.Va. — where we have our cake and eat it too. We work hard AND we play hard. Sleep is for the weary, which we are not. We are number one, my friends, just remember that.
In thinking about it, the University Guide Service should really focus their pitch on the Wahoo culture, because it can be wrapped up with a nice bow(tie) in these simple clichés quite nicely, right?
Eh, not so much.
Yes, I would be lying if I said I don’t plan on touting that top-public-school-in-the-nation horn when it comes time to find a job. To clarify, I’m speaking of our high rankings on the Forbes and U.S. News & World Reports lists, not the Playboy one, though those bragging rights exist as well. Depending on who you are you may be prouder of one accolade more than the other, but hats off to us for getting both of those stamps on our record. It feels good to be one of the best.
As Vanilla Ice so eloquently phrased it, “Anything less than the best is a felony.” But unfortunately for some of us, that mantra is taken a little too closely to heart at Mr. Jefferson’s University. It seems as though we Wahoos don’t believe in second place. No consolation prizes here. Last time I checked, my transcript listing for Econ 201 does not say, “C … but A for effort!”
Nope, it’s just a C. I verified just now.
Gone are the days when every handprint turkey got a sticker for good work. Rejection at U.Va. is just that — rejection, in the crummiest, emptiest sense of the word. When you fail to make Guides, or get turned down from the Comm School, you just go home and cry about it — yes, literally cry, because at U.Va. effort is meaningless when it doesn’t lead to achievement.
I’m tempted to contact whoever his or her highness may be in Rouss-Robertson with a rewritten rejection letter for this spring’s set of candidates. The letter would go a little something like this:
“Dear Blah,
“We regret to inform you that you will not be invited to join the Commerce School. However, we want you to stop by tomorrow. We have a cake with your face on it and a good pat on the back waiting for you in honor of completing the 100 prerequisites for applying, because that’s a hell of a lot of work. You must be really patient and awesome. Good job on trying really hard! Second ain’t too shabby, my friend, so long as it means you gave it the good old college try.
“Love,
“The Comm School.”
I don’t mean to pick on the Comm School in particular – it is just representative of any of the competitive institutions on Grounds.
But nevertheless, I bet Jefferson is rolling in his grave at that letter. Or is he? Jefferson wouldn’t want this institution to be suggest the end outweighs the means.
As a man of invention and scholarship, he certainly did not believe in discounting the process of education. As a matter of fact, if I recall correctly, the very reason we call ourselves first-, second-, third-, and fourth-years is because he believed that we are never “seniors” in the infinite process of individual growth and knowledge.
This isn’t playing for keeps, it’s playing for the sake of the game.
So, no matter how hard a bite it might be to swallow for those devoted TJ groupies out there, maybe our institution isn’t adhering to our founder’s ideologies as well as we like to think. We have no institutionalized positive reinforcement for our second-bests. As a whole, we fail to remember that the second-bests are still pretty kickass at this place.
So next time I fall short of some goal, I may, admittedly, still cry a little while watching “You’ve Got Mail.” But then I’ll pick myself up and give myself a pat on the back. I may as well, since no one else here will.
Kate’s column runs biweekly Fridays. She can be reached at k.colver@cavalierdaily.com.
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