I was talking to my good friend the other day, and he reminded me of something that I can’t believe I forgot about. Yes, the fall may be upon us, but there is something even more important on the horizon. No, it’s not Trader Joe’s Pumpkin Palooza or the hope of holiday songs beginning to play on the radio. It’s shoot your shot season. In case my dad is reading this, I will explain what shooting your shot means. When you shoot your shot you take the risk of pursuing a person that you are interested in. You ask them out to dinner. You ask them to a date function. You ask them to Final Fridays. If you’re really feeling brave, you ask them to Grit.
Shooting your shot season is my favorite season; it’s even better than six-pack season. I would say it also trumps cuffing season. It is a time filled with anticipation and courage. You never know when someone is going to shoot their shot with you, and you never know when you will shoot your own.
I will agree, shooting your shot is scary. You could be rejected. Even worse, you could be rejected and then have class with them every Monday for the rest of the semester. You could get “catfished.” You could go on a first date and realize that they are into anime or Wizard101. You could get friend zoned pretty hard. Maybe the scariest of all, it could all work out and a healthy relationship could start.
Shooting your shot has serious societal implications. It is an integral part of who we are today. Not shooting your shot is almost as scary as Halloween. Think about it, most of us were born because one of our parents shot their shot with the other.
I think we need to realize all the things that would and wouldn’t happen if people never shot their shot, if shooting your shot season did not exist:
- There would be a serious population decline due to the decrease of people getting together and having kids
- Your parent(s) would be seriously disappointed in you for not having grandchildren
- You would never know what it means to fail
- You would never get any practice with shooting your shot or working on your aim
- You would never be able to post a couples photo on Facebook so that your high school teachers could see that you’re not lame or still single
- #SpinsterVibes #LonelyHolidayVibes
- And if it is an ambition of yours, you would never be able to fulfill your dreams of entering into a “throuple”
So, this shoot your shot season don’t rely on Tinder or Love Connection. Rely on your inner strength. Feel the pressure of society at your back. Ready your armory and bring your best game to the court. Shoot your shot with that person whose Instagram you look at before you go to bed. Shoot your shot with that person who is in your class that you make too much eye contact with. Shoot your shot with the person you’re casually hooking up with. Shoot it by sliding into some direct messages, or just slide a person across the table your number. Alternatively, shoot your shot with a random person walking down the street that looks like they aren’t totally insane. The season is upon us, and there is no better time. Shoot your shot. There are serious consequences if you don’t.
The other day I shot my shot, and I think it went well. Luckily, I don’t have any classes with them, so if it goes downhill, I won’t have to see them every Monday.
Cate Streissguth is a Humor Columnist for The Cavalier Daily. She can be reached at humor@cavalierdaily.com.
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