Nothing makes me realize just how much I miss my family like a solo walk around Grounds.
I walk upwards of 17,000 steps a day — and whether it’s to class, the Aquatic & Fitness Center or some rehearsal for a play, I willingly traverse most of these treks alone. Each time I pass the Rotunda, I spot tons of smiling, friendly faces, yet still, they just cannot fill the void of my family.
Like many students at the University, I get easily caught up in checking every box on my never-ending to-do list. Calling home always helps me realize the importance of dedicating these frequent pockets of time to reach out to my loved ones.
Sometimes, I forget that my life was entirely different a few years ago before I arrived on Grounds. My family and I would play games together, make pizza on Friday nights and spend summers at the lake. Even if a game or two ended with a hilariously heated argument — my youngest brother and I fight to the bitter end when playing MLB the Show — reflecting on this time brings a lot of nostalgia.
Three years later, it still feels strange that the rest of my immediate family members keep living the life I once shared with them before coming to college. Though I make an effort to attend the concerts and plays that my brothers are involved in, it is difficult to put my University life on hold to go back home for a few days. Because of this, I tend to feel pretty disconnected from my family on the day-to-day.
I am extremely grateful for the close circle I have formed at the University — namely through wonderful friends at Spectrum Theatre and First Year Players. I love studying at Clemons Library with this beloved chosen family, and I especially value our late-night Cookout runs.
However, sometimes, I just long for my first home — the one with my brothers bickering, my mom baking delicious brownies and my dog loafing around on the couch. On days like this, I am reminded to use the mundane time spent walking from one destination to the next to pick up the phone and give them a ring. They almost always answer.
Whether it be on my way to class, Harris Teeter or a miscellaneous side quest to the Downtown Mall, these walk-and-talk sessions allow my family and me to thoroughly catch up. I check in with my mother, grandfather and grandmother basically every single day, and filling most of my transition periods with all of the news and gossip about my other family members makes my day feel so much brighter. I love hearing about my brothers’ orchestra concerts, and I especially enjoy scheming vacation plans with my parents — even though they went to Disney World last year without me.
While catching up on news from home, these calls also allow my family to stay in the loop about what I’m up to on Grounds — such as performing with groups like the Department of Drama. As a result, they’ve become more inclined to venture down to Charlottesville to support me in the audience, which truly makes my heart full.
Detailing my experiences to my family also provides me with valuable opportunities to self-reflect, as well as some much-needed grounding. It reminds me that although I’ve gone through changes during the past few years, home is a constant.
In addition to making my days feel brighter, I’ve learned that our steady communication during time apart helps to facilitate more intentional connection when we are physically together. For example, during my first year at the University, frequent phone calls with my mom led to us planning a trip to visit my grandfather in Wisconsin.
After all, there’s no guarantee that we’ll ever be geographically close in the future, so I owe it to myself and my family to set this precedent now of consistent communication.
If you happen to have some spare time and a phone in-hand on your journey to Boylan, Clark or Bodo’s, consider making a call or shooting a text to a loved one who makes you smile.
It will be worth it.
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