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Serving the University Community Since 1890

Kathleen Baines


A farewell salute

"I salute you." I last said that phrase to a woman who single-handedly destroyed the Ruby Tuesday salad bar.

The Peter Pan phenomenon

I don't want to grow up. After a night of book-club debates and several vigorous games of spades - read as: but not really - a group of friends and I did what every college kid with the Sunday morning blues does: a mandatory trip to Bodo's.

Rage against the maSheen

Charlie Sheen is God. And I'm an atheist. He smokes seven gram rocks because "that's how he rolls." He rolls invincibly, whether god or demon, hero or villain.

Global warming and cooling

An early spring? Yes, we will most certainly have one. Because Phil said so, and he seems like a pretty dependable guy. The academics call it clairvoyance.

Re-solutions

Out with the old, in with the new. Turn over another leaf. Enter a new chapter of your life. Embark on a new journey.

The reality of reality

I don't know what real is. Is it that which is actually experienced or seen or known? This question gets really messy, really quickly. According to the Oxford English Dictionary, reality is "the state of things as they actually exist, as opposed to an idealistic or notional idea of them." But in light of the influence of mass media and networks that shape our views about what we might call reality, everything I know of current events is filtered through the scope of someone else, someone creating a "notional idea" of the state of things. So what is real? Contrary to popular - or more appropriately, pop cultural - belief, reality TV is not real.

Sidewalk etiquette

Our generation has lost most forms of etiquette - it's a bold claim, albeit a true one. I have my own theories as to why this decline happened - the substitution of old-fashioned methods of child-rearing with the "I'm your buddy, not your parent" model, the refusal to believe that this is actually real life and that if you say something nasty, MTV won't intervene with a bleep or a conveniently placed commercial break.

Paranormal activity

Ghosts are real. I don't say this because "Paranormal Activity" caused me to lose sleep for three-and-a-half months - I'm so excited for the sequel because then I can pee my pants when anything moves at night - or because I have actually seen a ghost.

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